Custom Order Progress Update! Three Very Ambitious Hats!

I feel so lucky to be working on this custom order. You know, having quoted such a low price (all my fault) has really taken a lot of the pressure off. Which is strange, because this is some of the most intricate knitting I’ve done it a while. Wanna see? I wanna share!! (the last one may be my favorite!♥)

** Fancy Cables for a 3 Year Old **

 

This toddler-sized cabled hat was…ridiculous, but in the best way possible! Every section has a new cable to look at, which as a knitter is always a bonus for me. The yarn may be 100% acrylic, but a little guy is going to be wearing it, so my guilt is minimal. Also, despite the rumors, after it is washed – it really is much softer. Plus, I’m only charging $5.00 a hat. 🙂

 

** RIBS AND CABLES TO GROW IN TO **

This is probably the least interesting of all the hats I’ve been making. Following the same idea I followed with the Honeycomb Hat, I picked a rib stitch and a cable stitch and let my needles fly. I even used the same decrease. There is an odd sense of satisfaction with creating something all on your own, although I am sure some other knitter has already done it. Either way, it is another hat off my needles.

** THE BABY HAT I WOULD MAKE FOR MY (IMAGINARY) BABY **

There are a million reasons that I am in love with this patchwork knitted hat. I love the color changes. I love that all eight panels are different. I love the little fluff at the top of that hat that you get with a simple running stitch. More than anything I love how this hat told my knitting story.

You start with the garter stitch, the first thing you learn as a knitter. Moving on to stockinette and then seed stitch. These were my go to’s for probably my first whole year of knitting (I had a limited imagination, as well as very limited time to learn). The next panel is actually the wrong side of twisted ribbing, the first thing I every really messed up as a knitter. The whole hat was inside out and I didn’t notice! So I went back and learn the basic rib stitch to allow my confidence to grow back. After getting a handle on how knits and purls changed texture I added the basket weave stitch to my go-to dishcloth pattern. With my confidence reignited I went back to the twisted rib stitch, this time correctly! To finish it off was learning the basic cable – and it’s all history after that.

I will fully admit that this hat made me cry a little. Goofy, I know. I just imagined myself pregnant, knitting a hat like this to bring Trevor and I’s baby home in. I don’t know if that will ever happen (although I am a bit of a pessimist where this is concerned), but a hat that shows knitting progression just felt like life progressing. The thought that our lives will progress without a child can quite literally take my breath away. However, I will gladly take giving it to someone else, letting them bring home a baby in a hat made with unconditional love.

End of diatribe.

Well that’s it for me friends and neighbors, although I may have blown my blogging load and it’s only Monday! How about you, where are you getting your knitting/blogging inspiration this week?

The Munchkin & Harry Potter (Hat) Love

I have been listening to my friends talk about the birth of their children for years now, I may only be 28 but it seems my generation is okey-dokey with popping them out early. There is no judgement here; they all seem so happy, so content with life. I may experience the pangs of not having a child of my own – by which I mean someone who I carried in my body and brought into the world. I don’t think a day goes by where I don’t feel a sharp stab from this fact, being a woman whose body cannot do the one function that can create new life is utterly soul-shattering. Or it would be, if not for my Munchkin.

My Munchkin as Harry Potter – Age 4.

This is my niece Gloria, but for the purposes of this blog I will always refer to her as the Munchkin; this is what I’ve always called her and until she begs me to stop I will continue to do so. I did not give birth to the Munchkin, but I live and breathe for her, I would die for her. Isn’t this what motherhood feels like? Like an infinite well of love that will never go dry? She is the primary reason I strive to be a better person and has been since the day she was born.

5 Whole Minutes Old.

Barely 2 – Oh…that grin!

Christmas 2005 – I Could Stare All Day.

As the Flower Girl at our Wedding

Oh nostalgia, I am getting away from my point here!

Okay. Tears dried, nose blown and ready to move onward!

It was because of the Munchkin that I have been inundated with Harry Potter for the past 10 years. She LOVED these movies, we watched them so many times that the DVD’s wore themselves out and had to be replaced. I could quote lines from Harry Potter like a devout Christian can recite scripture, and I never grew tired of it. Watching her face come to life in the midst of imaginary worlds filled with magic created its own sort of magic here on earth. As she grew older and started reading the books I was elated at the possibility of continuing that magic, and I was never disappointed.

So as I was pondering Tiny Owl Knits blog and saw a Harry Potter-esq hat…well…my credit card has never jumped out of my wallet so quickly! The Parseltongue Hat may be my favorite Tiny Owl Knits creation due solely to the fact that the whole time I was knitting it was like a lovely trip down memory lane. I have been watching the Munchkin grow up for almost 12 years now (oh God, I feel old) but Harry Potter still reminds me of the magic of childhood.

So I knit, and knit, and knit until I could barely feel my fingers with my brand-spanking new addi-clicks which are as amazing as everyone says. It was the first time I worked a pattern from the crown down which was like a little adventure all by itself, luckily one that didn’t end in a brim that was overly tight due to my overly tight gauge. Stephanie Dosen is a genius with creative, whimsical patterns and this hat was no different. As I saw the snakes and their tongues sliding off my needles, well, I was giddy.

Cabled Snakes Hat.

Left Profile

Right Profile

Up Close and Personal Up Top

Even MORE Up Close and Personal!

Snakes Make Me Smile.

I love this pattern, and I will make it again and again. For now though, I am keeping this hat to remind me that life is magical. I may never be called “mommy” by a tiny little person who kind of looks like me, but I have been called “Rachel” for the last 12 years by my Munchkin, and there is nothing more I hold dear.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I want to say Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mom’s out there! Mother’s Day may be hard for someone like me but hey, I have a Mom so I get it. Two baby showers this weekend and I won’t have another for a whole 6 weeks!

So friends and neighbors, any patterns/books/music/movies that make you feel like there is still magic in the world? If so, I am dying to hear about it!

Stitch Week 7 – Heartfelt Thank You’s & Photo Editing Mishaps

Before I get started today, I wanted to say thank you to all of you that commented, liked or simply read Please Don’t Tell Me What I Cannot Do. It was overwhelming to see that the blogging world actually cared about my circumstances, and the outpouring of support and encouragement left me a bit dumbfounded. I’m still surprised that something that personal poured out of me, obviously it needed an outlet. Infertility, especially miscarriages is something that most people want to sweep under the rug, like seeing it in the daylight would solidify it in reality. It felt like a weight lifted off my shoulder to just write about it, to purge my mind. So thank you so much. Thank you.

* * * *

Perhaps white was not the best yarn color to try to photograph, but live and learn and play with photo editors! So with no further adieu, I humbly present Week 7’s Stitch Pattern!

Hello Week 7!

I will tell you that knitting this was a delight – a little confounding do to my dearly departed GG’s handwriting- but once you get past that it seemed to knit itself. When I started taking pictures of the dishcloth with my iPod, they were horrible! No joke, it was like the image just disappeared in the picture, which gave me the opportunity to play with both Instagram and Vintique . I haven’t done much editing with these applications, but playing around with them last night was a blast. Whether it was successful or not, I shall let you decide.

Sharpened and Hi-Light.

Super Duper Sharpened with Lo-Res Filter

Aqua Filter

To be honest, I am feeling the Epic Fail with theses. On the plus side, I was introduced to all the fun filters and sophisticated things that can be accomplished with an iPod; something I foolishly used (until just recently) to listen to music and check the weather. Silly me!

With the filters on my iPod not giving me what I wanted, I pulled out my trusty Canon and decided to go old school – if you can consider digital photography and Photoshop to be old school that is. I was pleased with the result;, this could be because of the abject failure of the first attempt but hey, I am still learning! Most people who work in hospitals aren’t well versed in the fine art of making their pictures not suck. Or maybe that is hopeful thinking! Anywho, here are the shots from the Canon.

Before Photoshop Close Up

After Photoshop, Thank you Hi-Pass

Full Frontal

Stitch Pattern Dishcloth

Magnified Close Up

Much Better!

So GG, what did you have in store for us this week eh? Well, once again there was no name to the pattern, no punctuation, and a very odd Cast On number. Well Week 7, you haven’t disappointed me!

co38 – Cast On 38 Sts. (Feeling Pretty Good)(Why yes, I am a smart a**!)

R1 correct, kall- Row 1: (RS) Knit all Sts. (Seriously, sometimes when I read these patterns I think of the movie Nell and her secret language!)

r2,pall – Row 2: Purl all Sts. (Nice, nice)

r3 p2 k1 end – Row 3: P2, K1 to end of row (This would have been simple, but there are 38 sts and that definitely is a multiple of 3! Eh, don’t fight it Rachel, just see what happens).

r4 k2 p1 end- Row 3: K2, P1 to end of row (Well at least we are being consistent with the whole incorrect number of stitches dealio. Again Rach, just breath in through your nose and out through your mouth).

rep to end, fin. – Repeat Rows 1-4 to desired length, BO loosely. (Dear God, Please let this work out ok!)

Well, it ended up working out better than ok! The pattern was almost spa like in its interwoven bumps and ridges. I would even go so far as to say it felt luxurious! With this in mind, I got on Ravelry and started my scavenger hunt for dishcloths and facecloths for something similar. The closest I found was from Anne Mancine listed under Spa Day Facecloth, which was the same pattern, just outlined with a seed stitch border. What I found a bit confusing though was that the pattern contained a Copyright – how is this possible? GG wrote the pattern (or more likely copied it down from a magazine or a book) circa 1968. Thus I remain confounded by the whole Copyright thingamajigger. Well, it is something new to add to the every compounding list of things to learn.

Thank you again bloggers for all your support and encouragement. Feel free to leave comments, questions or insights….your knowledge is priceless. OH, and Max says Hiya:)

Hiya Bloggers!

Please Don’t Tell Me What I Cannot Do

To Those Who Doubt Me,

Please, do not tell me what I cannot do. There are millions of things that are worse than an arthritic hand, a hand with only a thumb and pointer finger that are fully functional. Or the wee little panic monster living in my brain, you learn to live with OCD just like you would live with any chemical imbalance; one day at a time. Look around you; you never have to look very hard or very long to find something worse. I consider myself lucky in that respect.

If I want to mow my parents lawn as well as their next door neighbors – whose grandchild is dying in Children’s Hospital- please don’t tell me I cannot do this. I can tie a twisty tie around the power mower lever and push with my palms. I can rest for ten minutes here and there and elevated the swollen, screaming appendage then continue the task at hand (no pun intended, although it is a good one). Real pain is having a mother whose lungs will not allow her to do the yard work she has always loved, or losing a grandchild whose heart has given it up as a bad job.

If I want to clean my neighbor’s house to prepare for the impending arrival of their first child, please do not tell me I cannot do this. This is may seem like a double no-no for someone struggling with infertility, multiple miscarriages, and OCD that gets set off at the drop of a hat around baby items. It may seem a no-no situation to avoid the panic monster living in my brain, that little bastard and I have learned to live together, he won’t stop me from helping a friend when they need it. If I can survive the war in my brain knitting their baby blanket, so soft and sweet and utterly heartbreaking then my hand and brain can handle Windex and Pledge just fine.

If I want to for hours on end, please do not tell me I cannot do this. There are compression gloves – both those you can find in craft stores and the more sophisticated versions that specialist create for loads of money – that can pull the swelling from my abused joints. There is Advil, Tylenol, ice and heat to sooth the pain and malicious looking bruising. I don’t mind the dusky purple color my hand takes on, I choose to look at my hand and it’s odd coloring as a sign that another day has gone by and I have not let my life be dictated by something beyond my control.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I am not mad. I know you worry because you care.

I am not depressed. I know your concerns about the overwhelming emotions brought on by being surrounded by baby items with no baby of our own are painful, but hiding from them would be far more detrimental.

I will not be deterred. If I decided to stop living my life and doing the things I love for fear of pain, that would not be living. Life can be painful, usually is to be honest. It is how we choose to go about our pain that makes us who we are. I am choosing to be someone who will not be defined by a hand injury, I am not making it any worse doing these things, just opting to live with what I’ve got to work with. I will not be defined by the fact that I cannot have the child that I so desperately want. My heart may feel like it is breaking on a daily basis but to ignore or neglect all those whose bodies will allow them to make a new life would be selfish, inconsiderate and destroy that happier parts of myself. Family is, after all, what you make of it.

So please, take heart that I know my limitations, that I know how to live my life to the fullest and embrace the things that make me the happiest even if I get a wee bit teary here and there. And please – Don’t Tell Me What I Cannot Do.